An Actual Conversation About Libraries.
EB: What time do you get off?
Me: Three.
EB: That's cool. What are you going to do?
Me: I don't know. Probably stop at the library.
EB: The Tigard one or the one at the community center by your house?
Me: The Tigard one. I don't like the one at the community center.
EB: Why not?
Me: I don't like the librarians.
EB: What!?
Me: Yeah. Well mostly just one of them. Ugh.
EB: What happened?
Me: Well I went up to the front desk to ask about these paperback books in the hall. I asked the library if I could take one or if they had to be checked out. She was like, What? So I asked again, Can I just take one of the mass markets sitting in the hall on the green shelf. She was like I don't understand what you are saying. So I though, maybe she is deaf. Maybe she really can't hear me. So I asked her again - Are the books on the cart outside free? She said I still can't understand what you are saying. If you are asking about the books outside they are free to borrow and bring back or trade.
EB: (laughing)
Me: So the next time I went back, the computer I was using turned off for no reason. So I went up to the desk and it was her agin. I told her there was something wrong with the computer and could I just log onto another one. She asked What did you do to it? So I knew she could hear me. I said, I didn't do anything. It just shut off and I want to make sure I can use another computer with my login since we only get an hour a day on the computers. I don't understand.
So I started thinking, is she deaf and reads lips? Or is just me? Do I sound like I have a speech impediment?
EB: No. I don't think so.
Me: I started thinking that maybe my whole life I had speech problem. Or maybe I've been mentally retarded all these years and no one ever bothered to tell me. Like I wasn't self aware enough to know that I was and no one wanted to make me feel bad by telling me that I was special needs. But I've heard myself on tape. I used to write for the paper in college and recorded interviews. So I know at one point I probably sounded normal. I mean I've done a lot of drinking and drugs since then, but it can't be that bad. Well not so many drugs. But drinking, yes. So I guess if I end up at Goodwill Industries, that will be a confirmation.
EB: (laughing) You should write a blog about this.
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