On the bright side, I am lucky enough to have feet.

Today at work I kept saying "My feet have not stopped hurting from yesterday, I don't even want to know how they will feel after today."

After work I went and bought some shoes at DSW and even though they were $20, after a 50% discount (whatever that means at a discount shoe warehouse, I have a feeling it's like bargain books at work), I still felt really guilty about them. But trying them on was like night and day. I know I do not wear comfortable shoes but it has never bothered me as much as it has lately. Granted, I have walked 10+miles in the past two days. I actually sighed when I slipped my foot into them.

Last night I was walking home in the dark and up ahead I saw two men walking towards me before abruptly running and hiding behind a tree. I walked on and after a truck rushed by me, they came out from behind the tree.

"Excuse me." said the one with no shirt. "Have you seen a naked black guy walking around?"

The other one was taller, shirted and the douche-ier of the two. He also used the word nigger three times in the conversation.

Apparently, while consuming their MGD 40oz beers, their roommate wandered off. And then the cops showed up and they were certain it was for them though it turned out there were some other partiers a few doors down who were on the receiving end of the cop visit. In the mean time, they lost track of their drunk, naked roommate.

"Well, I have not seen anyone, let alone a naked guy." I suggested they look by the pool and hot tub.

As I walked away, I thought I wonder if we will have these types as neighbors in Tualatin.

Tomorrow is moving day. I could not be more excited. I am cautiously optimistic that I will be done moving by 4pm at the latest.

I am behind on my 10 books a month goal. Not only because of work, but general tiredness at home.

Right now I am reading Shopgirl by Steve Martin. I really like the book but every time I read a salacious passage, I think of Steve Martin playing the banjo. In related news, I think Novella would be a good name for a girl-child. Don't Costanza me out of this name.

Wherein Bry Makes It Obvious She Has Problems

Actual Conversation with a Friend.

Friend: That guy thinks you are cute.
Me: He does not.
Friend: He is giving you the eye.
Me: The stink eye?
Friend: NO! When you reached for your coffee, he smiled at you with intent.
Me: What? You are making shit up. He's probably high as a fucking kite.
Friend: I swear to God.
Me: Well it wouldn't matter anyways.
Friend: Why?
Me: Guys are douche bags.
Friend: But you don't even know that guy. How do you knw he is a douche bag?
Me: It is a calculated guess. If he does not start out being a douche bag, he will end up like one.
Friend: You are crazy.
Me: Oh, for sure.

Things to Report and Reports of Things

What a long day, again. The best part of the day (and by best, I mean worst) occurred when the VP of Visual Presentation and that other dude put me on the spot in front of the district manager, my general manager, and the two store managers. "Tell me what you were thinking with this table."

Cut to Bry sweating balls as she vocalized her reasons for not following the instructions on merchandising a table. Sounds lame and melodramatic, but if you work at the store and it is your job to think of these things all the time - then it was pretty serious stuff.

And it all had to happen on a Tuesday. Tuesday is the new Apocalypse.

No matter how crappy work was, it was all made a million times better when New Roommate reported that they figured our prorated rent wrong and we are paying a bit less when we move in NEXT WEDNESDAY!!!!

I am dog sitting for AM when she is in Eureka being a literary superhero (perhaps she wants to borrow my cape). This means I will be living in the boondocks for almost two weeks. But that is a few weeks away.

I am trying to be patient over the next week. Evey time I think I miss RF, I try to remember that once I move I will have more time and more money.

Last weekend I spent the morning with RO. It was awesome. We hit up the Farmer's Market and then shopped a little and got some Pita Pit for lunch. I love RO and I have been neglectful in maintaining our friendship. I am going to try to finish out the year (a May Resolution) by being a better friend.

If only current Bry could go back three weeks and tell future Bry not to do it.

I have come to the conclusion that Tuesdays will be my least favorite day of work from here on out. Tuesdays will be long, frustrating and stressful. But I love it. Well, most of it.

I don't think I have moved around this much at a job - running about, lifting, shifting and pulling - since I worked in a nursing home. And even then, I mostly worked nights which was a lot of just random tasks at scheduled times throughout the night.

I am moving in two weeks and could not be more excited. New Roommate and I were talking about buying a household planner to organize our cleaning, shopping and household chores. How nerdy is that?

I am not even worried about the actual packing as I currently own nothing and have nothing. This will quite possibly be the best moving experience I have ever been a part of.

Books I Read In April

Here is the list of books I read in April. Below is a recap of previous months that I tracked on my old blog.

This brings my total to 48 but I suck at math so you might want to check my addition.

April
1. The Last Single Woman In America
2. The Seduction of the Crimson Rose
3. The Temptation of the Night Jasmine
4. The Last American Man
5. A Reliable Wife
6. The Friday Night Knitting Club (which I for some reason just call Knit Night)
7. City of Thieves
8. Dead Until Dark
9. Living Dead in Dallas
10. Club Dead


March:
1. Sleepwalking in Daylight
2. Secret History of the Pink Carnation
3. Persistence of Memory
4. Masque of the Black Tulip
5. My Booky Wook
6. Marchelo in the Real World
7. Deception of the Emerald Ring
8. Smooth Talking Stranger
9. Turn the Page
10. My Horizontal Life
11. Are You There Vodka? It's Me Chelsea

February
1. Beastly
2. A Quiet Adjustment
3. The Reader
4. The Associate
5. Fool
6. Thanks For The Memories
7. Strange Bedfellows
8. Let the Right One In.
9. The Physick Book Of Deliverance Dane
10. The House of Sand and Fog

January
1. Rebel Angels - 592 pages
2. Age of Innocence - 384 pages
3. A Certain Slant of Light - 282 pages
4. Firmin - 176 pages
5. The School On Heart's Content Road - 352 pages
6. The Middle Place - 272 pages
7. A Journal for Jordan - 288 pages
8. Sunshine - 416 pages
9. Made From Scratch - 192 pages
10. Geography of Bliss - 352 pages
11. Shelter Me - 448 pages
12. Sedaris - 224 pages
13. Sweet Far Thing - 832 pages
14. Witches of Eastwick - 320 pages
15. Hunger Games - 384 pages
16. The Piano Teacher - 336 pages
17. Lady Chatterly's Lover - 400 pages

Well then.

New Roommate and I had a conversation today about what will happen when we move in together on May 27. So far New Roommate and I agree on everything. We will share food (for the most part) and will clean lots. Though she suggested making a chart for chores and things (there is a website) and I asked, "Yeah, but who is in charge of making this chart and rewarding or punishing for not following it?"

"I like making charts and being in charge," she replied. No shit.

So we shall see on that. I am thinking we should just divide things in half and swap every other week. Seems easy. And if one of us doesn't do our chores for the week the other one can say "Hey fuck-head, do the dishes."

But my plan doesn't involve charts.

Moving day is May 27 and we will be rewarding our moving slaves with beer and pizza. So sign up now. I will say my part of the moving will probably take one trip and involve no heavy lifting.

It was an odd week at work and it was crazy to go months working only weekdays to two weeks of split days off to my first week with Wednesday and Thursdays off. I seriously don't know what to do with myself. I am not going to figure it out before the 27th because there is no point developing a new routine over the next two weeks only to change it when I get a new apartment in a new part of town with new commuting hours and a new neighborhood and a new library.

In other news, I RSVP'd to a wedding today for July in Spokane. Then I mailed a Mother's Day card to Mom and hooked up my cable box because apparently they were serious about that whole digital switch over thing.

I am excited to move. Today New Roommate and I looked for coffee tables at Goodwill and talked about extra storage for the bathroom. It is funny how your priorities for living spaces changes as you get older. Right now I am excited to be living in a place where I can walk to work and the grocery store. Five years ago, I wanted to live right in downtown, close enough to walk to the bars and home on Friday and Saturday nights.