An actual conversation between RF and myself regarding hairspray.
Location: Safeway, just after getting my haircut, in search of hairspray.
RF: What kind do you use?
Me: Whatever.
RF: This is what I use, it smells good.
Me: But do they test on animals?
RF: I don’t know, how do you tell?
Me: Well does it say any thing about animal testing on the bottle?
RF: No
Me: Then they probably do.
RF: Well….
Me: I don’t want to kill animals with poisonous hair spray. I mean, I’ll still eat them, but they shouldn’t die because of hairspray.
RF: I think they just test on, like, poodles.
Me: That might be okay. I don’t like poodles.
Me: I want something that won’t leave my hair crunchy. Does your stuff make your hair crunchy?
RF: Yeah, but I want that.
Me: Oh. Do you think they make organic hairspray?
RF: I don’t know. Probably something.
Me: I want something cheap.
RF: Then probably not organic.
Me: I want something that says its cheap, doesn’t test on animals, and won’t make my hair into dry Ramen. Why can’t they put that on the bottle?
RF: Hmmm….
Me: Are you finding this conversation amusing or obnoxious?
RF: Hmmm…
Me: You can say I’m crazy. I know it.
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